But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
