We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
