We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I think a kid would responsible me up
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
