i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Can I color on your dick again?
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
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