I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
