Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
