found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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