The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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