You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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