Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
