Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Don't you send me to vm
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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