Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
