Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
