32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
