you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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