We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
