I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize