The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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