I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
These tits shall not be calmed
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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