Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
