she looked like the bat from fern gully.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
