you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
