she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
