i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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