if i can run in heels then i can drive
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
