Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Randomize
