names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
