My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
