Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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