She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
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