atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
