I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
