Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
