Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
