Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
