He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
