I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
