If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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