Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
