It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Randomize
