I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
