I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize