grandma shit on top of the toilet
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
