If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
she pinky promised me she was 18
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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