Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
