Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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