I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
