There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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