He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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