My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
