Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
