Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
